Importance of solitude for healing
So I just spent the whole month in solitude at home healing and taking care of myself.
I had planned this months prior but initially it wasn't going to be a whole month, just 10-14 days.
As 2019 crept closer to 2020, I felt like there were some energies within me waiting to be processed and I knew that I needed the whole month. I only left the home a total of 6 days. Once a week for groceries and groceries were cheap, around $20-30 for week's worth of food which I cooked for brother too occasionally.
As a practitioner of health and wellness, it is important for me to be at the top of my game, like 101% balanced. In a balanced state, I am able to perceive states of being from others with much greater accuracy and offer better service.
Often times I get told from others, "you know more about me than I know about myself".
That is because I have also peered deeply into myself and continue to do so on a daily basis. Therefore, it isn't difficult to peer deeply into another being. In this Universe, there is only one being split into many other bodies.
To make this healing retreat or perhaps isolation from the outside world successful, I had strict rules in place.
1. There will be no outside foods allowed nor foods prepared by another individual.
2. There will be no processed, frozen, canned nor any "dead" foods allowed. Foods with chemicals and additives are also a no-no.
3. The common cereal grains were not allowed which included rice, wheat, barley, millet, rye and oats.
4. The eating window was 12-8 but usually it was 12-6.
5. Before 12pm, I would be doing light stretching, yoga and meditation.
6. At noon, a serving of fruit to break the fast
7. After fruits, a meal of root veggies cooked in oil like olive oil.
8, After the meals at noon, it was "free time". Free time didn't mean to go on social media or watch netflix. Free time were activities which were beneficial to my well being and spirit. It included gaim.com, watching talks from Sadhguru, listening to channeling material, watching jewelry tutorials, watching dances, looking at art, reading books, drawing, journaling and of course making youtube videos.
9. As the sunsets, I prepared my meal and it was usually Wild Rice, Quinoa, Lotus seed, Buckwheat, Mung Dal, Adzuki beans, Black beans, root veggies, leafy greens. They were all soaked, sprouted or fermented beforehand so digestion was at optimal levels.
10. After dinner, I would relax a bit, have teas, play some music as I prepare for my evening session of light movement, dance, yoga and meditation.
11. Wednesday were my light-ceremony nights and Saturday were my deep-ceremony nights. A ceremony included drinking plant medicine to help me enter a deeper state of meditation. I gained lots of insights but much of the insights were gained during daytime without the use of plant medicines.
What happened during the month?
1. I was eating a lot less and that was what the body wanted, less time spent digesting food and more time spent digesting or processing old emotions/memories. On average, my daily food intake was around a bowl of fruits, 1 medium sized yam/sweet potato, 1-2bowls of whole grains with vegetables.
2. I realized that I don't need social media and I am definitely going to restrict my usage from now on to perhaps 3-5 times a month/once a week.
3. I started drawing, something that I've put on hold for years and I'm hoping to make some comics in the future! They will be half comedy and half spiritual theme. Something like cosmic joke.
4. I did not do as much "traditional" or "classic" yoga as I thought I would originally do. There were lots of movement, dancing and breath work involved in my personal practice. I wanted to make yoga videos but I made none.
5. Most of the healing came from massaging the body. I used massage oils and stones in the process. It helped to bring up lots of stored pain/emotions to the surface.
6. One night while I was just sitting there in deep contemplation, some majestic and supreme force came into my scope of awareness. It let me taste a glimpse of what it is like to be and feel the Universe at once. My ego was definitely not ready to handle it, fear was definitely there, and the experience humbled me instantly. I was sober and level-headed when this happened. But I was playing some darker and depressive in the music to help stir this emotion up.
7. When I allowed it, many memories of hurt and pain caused by teachers and professors were brought to the surface. That was big for me, I didn't know that left such a scar within me. I'm glad I healed it now.
8. There were of course deep insights and realizations attained during this healing retreat such as how to open up further, how to steer civilization into a healthy timeline and how to assist other beings on their path to healing.
My level of awareness deepened and I am insanely happy, perhaps the happiest I've been in my entire life. I love and will continue loving myself. I will consider to do this annually on top of my annual water fasts in June. Self-care is the best modality that works for me. If I love and take care of myself well, this energy can be felt by others. One thing I know is that if I ever get stranded on an island by myself, that would be considered paradise for me.
Recommended to others?
I recommend a solitude retreat to others who are serious about their personal growth, development and healing to try disconnecting from social media and the outside world. See how well you can take care of yourself without reliance from others and the outside world. See what comes up to the surface when you are being fermented by your own energies. See where that takes you. It could be frightening but to me, it is so exciting! The layers of self-discovery is endless! Our daily activities and work is sometimes masking lots of pain and emotions.